Father's vs Dad's

Any man that procreates is a Father whether you are present or absent in the child's life. But it takes a real man to be a Dad.



I was talking with a friend and we were discussing Fathers day and I was asked "Where is your father?" I said he's present but not present. I wanted to elaborate to the extent of saying that when I see his phone number on caller display I make it go to voicemail. My friend on the other hand has never seen their father, but in some situations I'm not sure who's worst off.



Ironically, the relatives I know best and consider my adoptive parents are his sister's and their husbands and to them I'm forever indebted. My two uncles are father figures or should I say dad figures that have showed me that there still are "Good Men" in this world. These are men that have driven to Buffalo to pick up their stranded niece from the airport when she ill planned her spring break holiday in Miami with 8 of her friends and couldn't get home. Who accepted her with open arms when she was down and out and saw no light at the end of the tunnel and she moved herself into his home without asking- for four years. Who said I was smarter then I thought and signed me up for summer school math because he wasn't accepting a high sixties grade as acceptable and said "I told you so!" when I came home with a ninety-five on my report card. Who when she wanted to go to post secondary school and couldn't afford the monthly payments said we'd pay them for you while you get your education. I'm talking about an excellent chef sharing his tips and secret recipes to prepare me for when I leave the nest. They say "The way to a man's heart is through his belly" and if I plan on touching his heart I need to know how to throw down. My man needs to know that when I cook it's to touch his heart and make his toes curl. LOL!!!



My uncles have been charged with a lot. They have had to accept a child that's not theirs nor their wife's. They have taken their wife's niece and accepted and loved her as if she was their own. These are the only father figures that friends, acquaintances or co-workers know. I may smile like my father, place my index finger on my nose like my father but these are all hereditary traits. I don't know much about him and vice versa. My father could never tell you what my favorite food, colour, tv show, movie or singer is. He could never tell you which school I went to, what sport I played, or who my first boyfriend was and how he broke my heart. My father, is just that I call my uncle's dad's.



If you're a father understand your responsibilities, take pride in your children as they are a gift from God. Ask your self, do I know my child's favorite tv show, colour, friends, or what it's like to stay up all night when they're sick? Instead of being a donor, take the necessary time to commit to get to know the life you helped create. After all, this should be the most important job in your life. You would have helped your child become a loving, well adjusted person who will have a role model to look up to and parenting traits to pass down.



After all, isn't that what being a dad is all about?